[shed_light]

If I feel incomplete.
If I feel short of able to love.
If I feel unable to offer.
If I feel I have nothing to give.
If I don't know if I can do this.
If I don't know if I am worthy of this.
If I feel guilty of having what others want,
not having deserved it because I struggle
making it work.

Arvottomuus, Epäonnistuminen,
Hylkääminen, Häpeä, Syyllisyys,
Pelko.

You don't belong to me.

One died,
So I could live.

feel it in the corners of the room
dark wind luring and lurking
to fight or to give in
it speaks of lethal logic
survival of the fittest

and i, i am not cut out for the
competition,
my soul crumbles from the comparison
and heart withdraws

it only wants to come out to play
in the sunny fields
where ligers whisk their tales
and chase unicorns and
get chased by bunnies in return

in those very same fields,
comfort and safety is restored
battle gear is picked up 
and strength re-gained
darkness defeated.

how can i invite you here
where i don't want to be myself
it's only gray around me
and numb and songs left unsung
can't find my way out

[:re-leaf:]

"Growing in friendship involves learning through conversation who you are as individuals. It's having fun together and spending quality and quantity time together.
...Relax and enjoy each other's company. Look for activities and settings that allow you to spend time together and talk freely. And don't limit yourselves to going out on dates. Look for ways to share the different parts of your life - the fun, the mundane, and the in-between. Work together and play together; serve side by side.
The strategic question to keep in mind is: How can you let each other see the "real you"? Whatever it is you love, what it is that captures your imagination, invite the other person into it - and ask the other to take you into his or her world too."

p. 79 bmg. - thanks Josh for well crafted words, this speaks to me so as what I believe is for myself a most in-depth and fundamental relation foundation building framework. It's the place, where guarding of the heart becomes mutual, where trust is build, where hardships are won and where joy begins to flow into every area. Where rest is assured. I long for this place.  

"Fairy tales do not tell children the dragons exist. Children already know that dragons exist. Fairy tales tell children the dragons can be killed." 

— G.K. Chesterton

"I don't deny," he said, "that there should be priests to remind men that they will one day die. I only say that at certain strange epochs it is necessary to have another kind of priests, called poets, actually to remind men that they are not dead yet." 

— G.K. Chesterton (Manalive)

[afterthought]

i am nothing but dust
yet gloriously formed
to please you
to be with you
to be a platform
for the life in you
in us,

my humble form
carries, generations
of royalty dethroned
obedience forces me to freedom
breaking the ties meanwhile

future sounds like thousand crystal bells
in the gentle evening wind
if this tightrope is made of barbed wire
i'll just fly across, unharmed
fountain of honey.

[Under Your Smile: Merchant Band]

Could I sit for a while under Your smile

And not say a word
‘Cause the cry of my heart is to be set apart
And I know You’ve heard
I’ve turned from all the ways and the choices that I made
That were hurting You
So I’ll trust and believe that You’ve washed me clean
And I’m pleasing You

I don’t want to be anywhere else but by Your side
I don’t want to be anything less than pure in Your eyes
(In Your eyes)

I am Yours, You are mine, beyond time
Nothing will separate us
Lord, hold me now in Your arms
Till forever comes

Could I sit at Your feet, feel Your gaze upon me
As I trust You’re near
All the words that You speak are life unto me
And I need to hear
Tears fill my eyes as I realize
That You’re wanting me
You can have what You see, please take all of me
You’re my only hope

[not too early or too late]

Oh solitude
Elegance of longing
Bittersweet and salty,
diamonds run down.

Deliberately,
knitted together,
Scenery, captivating.

[He hears us.]

If I could only
show you the way of my mind
Share to you the map of my heart
But all in one go, it's too much
So Beloved, My Friend,
Let us just Rest
Abide,
Breath,
Smile-in-take.
It will all come,
blink by blink,
brick by brick,
undone and completed.

If I could only
take away all the pressure of you
smoothen your frown
and kiss gently your brow,
we will be just fine,
as we've always been,
He carries us about in His pocket,
perfect plan,
You, Me, and Glorious things.

Assured.
Assimilation.
Acknowledged.

Each day, let's run together,
wild horses and wild eagles.
In Green pastures
and by still waters.