here again

awake i dreamt of a light that falls
softly on these plain landings
like well-composed notes on
hand-drawn lines
glass half full or empty

accented colours
hiccups of reality
universal script
not so much to say
i strech these letters
smile and chuckle

in small beginnings
dreams are brought alive

[ohoo]

And the Heavens prove trustworthy,
there is mercy in the new day,
joy and peace comes with believing.

Follow these steps they lead home,
heart singing with
little birds
and
you'll teach me what life means

Friends, it's a sabbath day,
I'll call in rest,
restoration,
catch all the little foxes,
today grows roses
and Vine.

[dealing]

I think I'm dealing with anger here,
letting it fuse and diffuse.
Under anger sits sadness,
loneliness and rejection,
longing for safety,
for connecting and knowing.

Why did you think you needed to provoke me,
take a risk of hurting?
Or was that what you wanted,
to hurt, to make me feel
your pain,
to see your side of the story,
to feel your fear,
to confess not being trustworthy?
What do you want from me?

Don't worry, I already felt the guilt,
I can relate to the role of wrongdoer,
identify with shame.
I'm not looking for you to comfort,
or to rescue or to deny yourself.

Sometimes I'm not sure if you see,
what provoking,
probing and poking,
causes underneath the skin.
I still bruise easily,
and I know, I know that
you mean well,

and it's important that you,
keep your ways and
keep you and
keep your boundaries.
But sometimes, it still hurts.

Arms wide open,
I stop defending,
look up,
trust.

[hengitä hiljaa]

The dismissive nature of pain

quite eloquent

like a squirrel forgetting
the hiding places of it's treasures,

purposefully countering brokenness

So I need you to hold me,

Reminding, i don't disappear

Darkness cannot eat me alive

It's been defeated so I won't be

And there I can open the wells

Let the waves come crashing in

Such deathly sorrow

Sea bearing in it's arms,

the caps of the waves carrying
all nutrients,

treasures from the unsearched shores

soothing cure, smelling pure

Search me and know me,

Bring healing within

Inside out

Spring cleaning

Receiving 

and entering,

in

[breeze]

maybe it's the brightness of sunshine,
leaving me feeling so incredibly fragile/
craving to cocoon,
not fully trusting these wings

beauty that attracts predators
will you be my unfailing walls of defense
yes, create around me layer of your life,
breath, trusting, home,
for the name on your hands engraved.

[scandals of grace]

chosen to be your chosen,
strength that sparks
to change/
to not give up,
you make me feel loved/

when skin beaten and bruised
is touched,
it still remembers/
shivers and hides –
your touch heals,
we are walking through pain/

sadness released, brings relief,
new growth/
tears baptizing life of
new beginning
new foundations,
commitment,
new covenant.

[was|is|tobE]