[then just rather dubious]

consciously neurotic/
rather dubious/
sounds about right/
left right left right.


in meeting yourself there is no by-pass/
just an inner being/
mind and heart minding the gap/


chase away all of those little what ifs of sleepless night/
they bear no fruit
but scare them of/
you guilty one.


leap. skip a beat. reverse. turn and /

spilt over/ configuring heart/ 
bursting out beauty and smiling and yet tearful pain/ 
tastes like learning to run further/ breathing deeper

recognition/ of something that vaguely sailed by past tahiti of a moment/ 
echoing of our laughter bouncing of cold walls cobblestone alley way/ 
was it ever there/ yes yes it's calling us/ come.

[While I am just happy.]

Eleven most fascinating things about life right now:

1) capturing light
2) learning to paint
3) discovering hidden treasures of the scriptures
4) trying out new recipes
5) overcoming fears
6) figuring out boys
7) learning heart's desires
8) happiness as status quo
9) God's provision
10) learning to listen new music
11) understanding a bigger picture

And while here, why wouldn't you visit over my brother Joe's blog, he has usually something well worthwhile reading up there. Peace and out.

[The King is enthralled by your beauty." Psalm 45:11]

I've blogged this same bit in september 22nd in 2007, bu  t felt that it would be alright to borrow it again for you guys to read, it's still something that very much touches my heart. Today I felt in my heart something saying that this new season is once again about growing and what is the most dangerous and adventurous and challenging and rewarding thing I can do is to grow to be more of myself to be more the one I was created to be. And I think this text in a way spurs me toward that freedom. Hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

__________________________________________________________________

I want to be beautiful
And make you stand in awe
Look inside my heart
And be amazed
I want to hear you say
Who I am is quite enough
I just want to be worthy of love
And beautiful.
(Bethany Dillon) 

Warrior Princesses

"Me, a princess?"
"You are the legal heir."
"I never lead anyone."
"We will help you to be a princess, to rule. If you refuse to accept the throne then the
kingdom will cease to exist as we know it."
--The Princess Diaries

In God's name we must fight them!
--Joan of Arc
Women are often portrayed in stories and tales as the "Damsel in Distress." We are the ones for whom men rise up and slay dragons. We are the "weaker sex"; said to faint at the sight of blood, needing to be spared the gory details of battle whether on the field or in the market place. We are the ones waiting in our flowing gowns for the knight to come and carry us away on the back of his white horse. And yes. There are days when a knight in shining armor would be most welcome. We do long to be fought for; loved enough to be courageously protected. But there is a mighty fierceness set in the heart of women by God. It is true to who we are and what we are created to do.

Women are warriors too.

Redeemed women of God have tender, merciful hearts, backbones of steel and hands that have been trained for battle. There is something incredibly fierce in the heart of a woman that is to be contended with, not dismissed, not disdained, but recognized, honored, welcomed and trained.

(Stasi and John Eldredge: Captivating , p. 186-188) 

[BLOG A KORAN day]

This blog is my participation to 
"Blog a koran day 9/11" by Tall Skinny Kiwi
In order to understand, I need to know,

when I get to know, I begin to love.

Loving, I want to know,

knowing, I begin to understand.

Recently, I had a sabbath meal with friends.

One of our newest friends is a iranian muslim.

It was a privileged to sit by their side,

eating bacon sandwiches and know

that we are both valued and loved by God.

I value friendships, fellow travellers highly.

We are made to make this journey together.

Sometimes you don't agree on everything,

but it doesn't mean you can't travel together.

It's good to have something to talk about ;)

"In essentials unity

In non-essentials liberty.

In all things love."

If we think we know the Truth,

we can invite others to seek Him 

with us, with grace and love.

If we invite others, we have to take

responsibility about them.

I have a friend, a lover and a King

who said "Follow me."

"I am the way, the truth and the life."

Many books are written about him,

many songs are composed about him,

many arguments are held about him.

In my opinion, nothing beats getting to know him personally.

A book I read recently was written by a former muslim,

and she often said that not many muslims have

read Qu'ran in a language they understand.

I must confess I've never read Qu'ran, would

be interesting to read it to see what our

muslim brothers and sisters believe in.

Also I think that everybody should read the Bible,

in order to understand what us Christians believe in.


This is a quote from Qu'ran that talks about Jesus:

"Christ, the son of Mary, was no more than a messenger; many were the messengers that passed away before him. His mother was a woman of truth. They had both to eat their (daily) food. See how God makes His signs clear to them; yet see in what ways they are deluded away from the truth!" (Sura 5:75).

Now I must go and sleep,
tomorrow is another exciting day.
Good night, lovely dreams of a better world
let us respect and love each other

30 Seconds to Mars - Closer To The Edge

Heard a cover version of this song this afternoon when my housemate

had his band practice in our front room (brilliant anyway,

to have a live band playing all afternoon at your house, and they were pretty

good too, and with definitely no shazam needed with songs like

hotel california, don't stop believin', africa and walking in memphis...)

and I liked it so I thought I'd share it! Enjoy!

[a problem and a simple resolution]

They're all reactions! One thing begets the next. A man has a weakness, he's flawed. That flaw leads him to guilt. The guilt leads him to shame. The shame he compensates with pride and vanity. And when pride fails, despair takes over and they all lead to his destruction. It will become his fate... Something's gotta stop the flow. -Jacob (Pathfinder) in the movie Ink

...

Welcomed in to the courts of the King

I've been ushered in to Your presence

Lord, I stand on Your merciful ground

Yet with every step tread with reverence

And I'll fall facedown

As Your glory shines around

Yes, I'll fall facedown

As Your glory shines around

Who is there in the heavens like You?

And upon the earth, who's Your equal?

You are far above, You're the highest of heights

We are bowing down to exalt You

So let Your glory shine around

Let Your glory shine around

King of glory, here be found

King of glory

- Facedown by Matt Redman

[..1..2..3..]

A bohemian longing for law and order/ 
a revolutionary in a self-proclaimed cage of eternal sunshine/ 
idle intelligence running in circles of cultural tight ropes and language barriers/ 
ill-timed beginnings and so many false smile ends always one too late/ 
deep secret fragile desires/ 
and so many re-constructed mondays/ 
Freedom, you bring me hope of an eternity ahead!


I would definitely need a project larger than my own self/
I need other human beings
to share to bounce of to grow with to feed to laugh to cry to listen to
How can I see if I have ever grown or even grown up
if there is no one to measure it against
no one to draw the little pencil line on the door frame.


Thoughts that had no reason to be worded out loud
echoing off walls of these empty halls

Haunting presence of the dreams of a shared existence.